Waiting for 2020 to be over, I had great optimism that the world would breath a sigh of relief and get on with a feeling of change and forward thinking. Well, the events of the past week have burst that bubble, for me anyway. It's sometimes tough through the holidays to stay optimistic and positive, especially when my family has experienced deep personal loss. I
felt blocked from any creativity. I know I'm not alone in feeling this way. Many people I have spoken to have felt confusion and have had a lack of ambition or creativity in the last year.
So, how to get over it? I pulled out my painting supplies to start another painting in my current series, Women Who Have Guided Us On Our Path, and started my latest work in a tribute to Marie Madeleine Fourcade, the inspirational resistance leader in France during World War II. The only woman leader of a resistance network that contained over 2000 agents, her devotion and bravery helped the Allies win the war against Nazi Germany. She is certainly someone who needs to be celebrated.
The work has been tough. As with every painting I begin, I have self doubt. Is what I am doing any good? Does it mean anything? I think every artist feels these feelings of negative self criticism. Sometimes it's hard to get beyond that, but the only way I know how is to just continue. I can let everyday events and responsibilities take precedence over painting. Some days it's a delaying tactic from me facing my canvas. But, eventually I break the block and once I start painting I go to that other place in my brain that totally engages me and turns my thinking around. That is the wonder of creativity and I am so grateful that I have it in my life.